Transparent Thursday Post:

For those that know me, y’all know that “I’m an artist and I’m sensitive about my ish”. I’m a perfectionist and I will study long and hard so that I get things right, the first time.

Well…one of my favorite desserts is the French Macaron. Being a baker, I make it my business to master my favorites so that I’m not forced to purchase the desserts from others all the time. While all recipes are precise, this recipe is delicate and precise AND you need EXTRA patience because it calls for you to take everything that you would normally do a step further.

So…I finally worked up the nerve to attempt to make French Macarons for the first time AND I BOMBED!!! Well…it was one of those things like,  they taste good but they don’t look right!🤣🤣🤣

I’m laughing now but I dropped a few tears because when I captured the picture, I immediately knew that I messed up.

Moral of the story: never be afraid to go after the things that make your heart smile. Although we learned at a very young age, if at first you don’t succeed, try again, as we grow up we don’t extend ourselves much grace. We become accustomed to perfecting and miss the joy of the experience.

So tonight as you wind down, make plans to go after those things that you’ve put off due to fear. Start formulating your plan and attack that goal with every thing in you. 🦋😘🦋😘🦋😘

Pain is something that we will all experience in life. No one is immune. While we generally believe that certain characteristics or actions of another are the source of our pain, the truth is, most times the pain is self-inflicted (I’ll save this for another post).

Now, the trouble with attributing your pain to the characteristics or actions of others is that you begin to believe that if you remove the person and every person that you meet with the same characteristics or behavior, the pain will end. Sadly, this solution does not deal with the underlying cause of the pain nor its lingering effects, it will only give you temporary relief and you could end up pushing the wrong people out of your life.

I learned this lesson the hard way (as many of us do). I confused the grief that I felt when that person was around with what I was actually grieving. It was not their presence that caused me grief, it was something inside of them that forced me to walk in my truth. Something in them would not allow me to hide behind the mask I wore. Their presence literally forced me to deal with me.

As you grow through life, search for the root issues. If you only look at the surface, you will stunt the process.

Remember, people come into your life for numerous reasons, allow people to do what they must and then let them go on their way.

Are you being specific with your request for God?

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Like many of you, I tuned in to watch the Bobby Brown Story, for many different reasons (I have not read

his book).  First and foremost, I wanted to see Bobby Brown’s life through the eyes of Bobby Brown.  I have read articles and seen stories told from the perspective of an onlooker BUT nothing beats a first hand account of a story.

Listen…by the end of day 2, I saw a piece of all of our lives in Uncle Bobby’s story.  I saw a life full of highs and lows.  I saw heartache, pain, and a man that has had to pick up the pieces and start over again and again. I saw someone that has loved and lost.  Someone that was full of life and wanted to enjoy every moment.

If you watched the series and picked through to determine which parts you choose to believe then you wasted your time.  We all go through trials and tribulations so that we can help others to see that there is victory on the other side.  Each part of the story built upon and expanded to another area of his life.  In the end, he is the sum total of every experience and a work in progress, still striving to get better.

I am grateful that Uncle Bobby brought HIStory to television and gave the world deeper insight into his life.  The story is told from HIS prospective and the wonderful thing about you telling your story is that no one gets to tell you what happened to you.

Be courageous enough to tell YOUR story.  The world is waiting.

I recently had an epiphany…many years ago, I was a side chick.  Now, I know the realization sounds a little shocking.  You may be asking questions like; how could you not know that you were a side chick?  Well, the answer is that I did not care enough at the time to think about it.

How does that happen???  Kinda like this…I was focused.  Focused on what I wanted. I was the boss of me.  He was a welcomed distraction but not enough of a distraction for me to realize all the moments he was an afterthought or a fill-in-the blank.  Now I am not giving him a pass and I do not promote cheating.  What I am saying is that I totally missed the process of changing from the object of his affection to the second place chick.

The story went something like this…we met under somewhat strange circumstances and we became almost inseparable.  In the beginning we talked all day, everyday, even while we were at work(shout out to Bluetooth technology) and then we talked until we went to sleep at night.  We also saw each other several times a week, at different time intervals.

At some point, I guess he grew tired of my unavailability/unwillingness to be who he needed and began to fill-in-the blank.  To be honest, I am certain that she was in the picture all along and I was quite possibly the fill-in-the blank BUT this is a tale about balance, not resolving the question of why he had the desire for two women.

So, back to my point…One night while we were together, he excused himself to answer a call.  He did not walk away or try to hide the fact that a female was calling.  When he hung up, I told him that was disrespectful or something to that effect.  He clearly responded that “if I was on my job, he would not be answering the phone.”

After this incident, I began to pull away from him and seek I wanted in my life(remember I am the boss of me).  I remember him questioning me about the distance and of course my answer was that I was busy.  Eventually, I told him that I started a new relationship and he confessed that he realized that he was in love with me.  The problem was that we had both run out of time.  There was nothing that he could say to repair our situationship, I did not trust him anymore. The good news is that we both went on to live our happily ever after eventually.

You see in life we put so many things before ourselves and our relationships all under the goal of looking out for ourselves( see how that does not add up).  Often times we think that we can push things to the side while we work our plan but we cannot control time nor add time when it is lost.  In order to achieve what we really want and need in life, we must find balance.  We have to be wives to OUR husbands, mothers to our children, girlfriends to OUR boyfriends, a friend to our friends and fulfill our positions at work,  all at the same time. All these roles require our attention and a certain level of devotion.  I believe that this is achieved when we prioritize our roles.  Ask yourself what is really important and adjust accordingly.

From December , 2016…

After recently attending a Jodeci concert, I was left with a longing for REAL music.  You know the kind that takes you back to your own life experiences.  Some were good and some were not so good but they added depth to your life.  The songs make you smile, laugh, and cry all at once.  You learned the lyrics (or your adaptation) because you spent hours upon hours feeling the songs.  See, this type of music had its own character, it became a part of you, your story, your evolution.

These days it is difficult to find anything on the radio that has meaning or character.  Long gone are the days of talent being required to step into the studio.  With the current trends, all an artist has to do is look the part.

What do I mean by look the part?  I am glad that you asked…looking the part consist of whatever fad that is currently in rotation.  The problem with these look-a likes is that they do not give us quality music.  Instead we end up with catchy tunes that we only remember because the radio plays the same songs every 15 minutes.

Examples?  I am glad that you asked…this one singer/rapper.  Now before you send your killers after me follow me for a moment.  While I believe that many of his lyrics are…hmmmm…well…they…who am I kidding, I cannot tell a lie.  ALL of his songs sound exactly alike to my ears.  “He’s flying somewhere with his homies to pick up strippers. Oh and he started from humble beginnings.”  Now to his credit, I have been advised to listen to his music that does not play on the radio.  Well of course I still have not heard this music that they speak of because nothing on the radio has made me want to take a closer look.  My question is this…if he has better music, why don’t I hear this music on the radio????  Because good content is no longer a desired, duh!!!

Music is being offered to us like .01 candy at a parade.  It is a cheap alternative to the real deal.  I want that ole thang back 😦