Often times after a “what now” experience, we are left in many shattered pieces.  These shattered pieces represent our delayed dreams, heartbreak, baggage from relationships, lost momentum, etc.  You may feel confused or hopeless when looking at all these pieces and wonder how you will move past this. These feelings are natural because when your world has been turned upside down, it is difficult to land on your feet.

BUT…there is good news on the other side of a “what now” experience. This time is a refining period and during your refining period, there will be twists, turns, and stretching.  Just like gold, refining will remove the impurities from your life and result in a new(better) version of you.

Sooo…here’s the secret…Simply, “Quit cursing the process! You cannot choose the path that God decides to take you to get you to your destiny! Hold on and TRUST the ride!” ~Tera C. Hodges

This statement is so powerful!  When we accept that God’s ways are far better than our own, we experience peace, the peace that passes all understanding.

Chorus for Today: “You, know, sometimes in life, situations are going to occur where you may look to the left or the right and you can’t find any answers and you can’t find anybody to help you. “BUT, I’m reminded of the Word that says they that wait upon the Lord, He shall renew their strength. They shall mount up on wings as eagles. They shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint. Come on. You’ve got to learn how to wait.~I Don’t Mind Waiting

When searching for a romantic partner, what do you look for? What qualities are important?  What are deal breakers? Do you pray about these things or do you rely on your intuition? …What will you settle for?

BUT the real question is, are you ready to settle down?

Often times the answer will be some loose translation of the word yes because we continually ask for things that we are not prepared to receive.  You will fiddle through different reasons and provide an answer matching the overused “it’s time” catchall phrase.  But the truth is, you will say whatever you feel is necessary to convince YOURSELF that you are ready.

Do not settle down just because you are getting older, you want children, because your parents tell you to, or because you do not want to be alone.  This is a recipe for disaster because you will end up with someone who you are unhappy with.  Then in turn, end up resenting that partner and living in your own personal hell.

You must be honest with yourself, because when the dust settles, you have made a decision that will change the course of your life.

Choose a partner when you are happy with yourself and the way your life is progressing (Notice I did not say when you become a millionaire, make partner at work, become debt free, etc.).  Don’t seek perfection (here’s a secret: it does not exist), instead look for the “perfect verse over a tight beat”

❤ ❤ ❤

Chorus for today: “My vision, so misleading.  Make believing in things I never saw.  Deep inside we’re not right, no…things got different, ohhh it’s not what we thought, no.~Going Under, KM

When you think of your greatest influence, who/what do you rank at the top?

I hear these questions frequently, when are you getting married; why do you only have one child; or why do you want more children?  Then there are the follow-up questions, are you gay; are you able to have more children; and do you know you’re getting too old to have children?

My questions to them are, why do I have to be married by a certain age; why must I have multiple children; or why can’t I have multiple children?

People are so caught up in what society deems “normal” or “acceptable”, that they fail to realize they are not thinking for themselves.  Society has become their god and whatever appeals to society, they accept it and judge others by the standard. We have lost individuality…what is the real reason the divorce rate is so high and why is it that single parenting is now chosen by men and women? Why do we praise other human beings so much?

I would like your feedback, what are your thoughts on these questions?

What do you see?

While having lunch, I took this photo.

So many times we miss the beauty in life because we are so focused on the way things look instead of the way things are.  As I walked away from school this afternoon, I walked under I-4, across the railroad tracks, and pass the police station to get to my destination.

When I walked under I-4, my mind began to wonder, how many people called the little nook where the interstate meets the support structure below home every night.

When I crossed the railroad tracks, I had to be careful to watch my steps so I did not fall.  That gesture made me think about how many times we give up on our goals because the process to reach them has been slow.

As I walked pass the police station,  I saw a couple of officers going in.  Watching this made me wonder how many people walk out of that building everyday not knowing if they will return.  Also, I thought about how many people walk into that building and never walk out.

By the time I sat down for lunch, I was overwhelmed with a sense of gratitude.  But for the grace of God, I would have given up on my goals because there were many doors shut in my face before I got to this point.  But for His mercy, I would have been taken into a police a station, never to walk out again.  But for God’s provisions, I would be sleeping under I-4.

I see hope in EVERYTHING because I have seen darkness in many things and even in those times of darkness, God assured me that He was still by my side.  So, what do I see in this picture?  I saw infinite possibilities for my life because the sky is the limit to what I can have.

What do you see?

While watching the movie, Son of God, I was reminded why I live the way I do, love the way I do, and forgive the way I do.  But for the Grace of God, I would not be here.

Just as Lazarus was raised from the dead, God has brought all of us back from some dead situations(spiritual death, illness, dead-end relationships).  God has already said that “this sickness is not unto death, but for the glory of God…”.  He already knew you would be placed in these situations and He has already made provisions for you to live through what you thought would kill you.

Just as Jesus waited 2 days to go back to check on Lazarus, God will wait His predetermined time to come check on you.  This does not mean He wants you to suffer, you actually play a part in when you will come out of your dead situation.  You will remain there until you decide that you cannot fix the issue and begin to totally rely on God. When you begin to totally rely on God, your light shines and others will know God by what they see in you.  When you encounter darkness, your light will emanate so that you may find your way out and just like Lazarus, you shall live.

How I Turned Sexual Temptation Into A Blessing

Jul 22, 2014 | by Anonymous

Dear God: Thank you for showing me the way out of temptation and into the blessing and discipline of singleness.

Abstinence. Celibacy. Single. Married. Divorced. They are all words.

More importantly, they are all choices.

And more often than not, they are related to that three letter word that so many people have trouble discussing.

Sex.

I did not wake up one morning and decide “I’m not going to have sex for seven years”.

I did not suddenly decide, “I think I am going to stop dating for a while.”

I DID wake up one morning after having sex with someone I wasn’t married to, yet madly in love with, and crying my eyes out.

It wasn’t the first time. He never noticed my silent tears.

The agony of immeasurable pleasure combined with unbearable guilt.

But my soul was tired.

I wasn’t mad at men.

I was tired of enjoying the best sex ever and IMMEDIATELY feeling disconnected from the one I love the most: GOD.

I was tired of starting my prayers with “God, I’m sorry, I did it again and it’s really hard for me to stay away because I LOVE him.”

I was tired of not feeling free to take my problems to God because I KNEW I was INTENTIONALLY sinning.

I was tired of trying to ignore God whispering in my ear as I got myself all dressed up and smelling good for my “booty call”.

And most importantly, I was tired of not enjoying the full benefits of living a life COMPLETELY lived for God.

It wasn’t random sex.

It was someone I loved more than I had ever loved before.

I was monogamous.

But, I ended the relationship.

When it was over, I was sad. I even tried to go back.

I couldn’t understand how I could hurt so much.

I couldn’t understand how we both could love each other so much and not find a way to make it work.

I couldn’t understand why I could feel so convicted for doing something that felt so good, so spiritual.

But, I KNEW: I NEEDED to obey God.

What was I to do? Go find another man to sleep with?

Nope. It would not have been the same. I only wanted that man.

I realized that each time I gave my body to that man, I was taking something away from God.

I was also depriving myself. Depriving myself of a clean conscience.

It didn’t matter what others around me did. I knew what God told ME!

After that, when a man approached me, I turned him down. I needed to learn the art of discipline.

I had spent so many years of my life, using my body for my OWN pleasure, that I knew I needed to do some SOUL CLEANSING.

So I took it one day at a time. One guy at a time. One No at a time. And now, I have not only days of celibacy, I have YEARS of celibacy.

Discipline.

Do I miss a relationship? Yup!

Do I desire companionship? Yup.

But, this time, I’m waiting on God.

Are there times I want sex?

Um, heck YEAH!

I KNOW what I NEED, WANT and DESERVE in a relationship and I won’t settle anymore.

And as I learned discipline, guess what happened?

I found my purpose.

I honed my talents.

I made new friends with similar interests.

I focused.

I created an online radio show.

I pursued my writing career.

I had a successful television career.

I started my own business.

And I got closer to God than I ever imagined possible.

I hear him more clearly.

The nights of staining my pillow with tears of guilt and shame are long gone.

I know people like to say, “just give it to God”.

The truth is: It doesn’t happen in an instant.

It’s a DAILY DECISION.

So, if people ridicule you for being celibate, ignore the ignorance.

The orgasm they enjoy for a moment, can’t compete with God’s everlasting love!

Even in my initial walk towards the celibate life, I slipped up a few times.

And finally, I made the decision to leave.

And that meant no more sex.

I once went a month, then three months and FINALLY I learned to STOP counting how long it’s been since I’ve “had sex”.

I started counting how long my body has belonged to God!

And now, I’m eagerly anticipating that man, my future husband that God has in store JUST for me.

Because I am disciplined.

And obedience is better than a sacrifice.

Copyright © 2014 · The Praying Woman · All Rights Reserved

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Flowers do not worry about how they are going to bloom.  They just open up and turn toward the light and that makes them beautiful~Jim Carrey

Just like a flower, we are not to worry about how we are going to evolve.  Our job is to look up to God from which we receive light and the beauty of who we are will be shown for the world to see.

As I celebrate day one of my birthday, I am reminded that so many do not see the beauty within themselves.  Some people have put on masks to cope with situations in life.  One great thing about God is that He will always send an encouraging word when you are in need.

For those who feel that they cannot escape their past, God is forgiving.

For those who feel that they cannot make right their wrongs, God is a fixer.

For those who believe they are under a generational curse, God breaks chains.

For those who hide because of the perception of others, God is judge and jury.

For anyone who thinks God has forgotten about you, God is waiting on you.

If you do not fit into any of these categories, God is the alpha and omega.  He has you covered on both ends. Today celebrate you and all that God has, will, and is doing in your life.

“Falling in love with Jesus was the best thing I’ve every done”~<3

I have a request to write about love.  Well, everyone knows that I love, love and I could write about it ALL day long!!! ❤ ❤ ❤

Love is the foundation of all human interaction.  It all began with “for God so loved the world that He gave…”.  Love is Jesus on the cross.  It is this same love that we are to show towards one another.  The things we say, do, and think all should stem from love. The first love we consciously experience is from our parents. It is at this point that things can go one of two directions, right or real wrong {I will save this for another post 🙂 }. However, these experiences are the building blocks from which we develop our basis for love.

As children, we are in an active learning state and we crave knowledge.  We soak up everything we see, hear and feel, then we mimic or reject those behaviors.  These behaviors are what we know to be love.  When we mature we begin to have a new craving, we seek to understand ourselves and develop our own sense of love and we then connect with individuals who we feel meet our needs.  Our subconscious mind creates these connections so that we may receive this love and allows us to show our love towards others.

The most common mistake that we make in relationships is that we seek some magical formula that is supposed to create a perfect love.  Perfection is for God alone and not man.  The foundation of the word relationship is “relation”. Relation is the manner in which people communicate, behave, and interact with each other.  This goes back to love.  The love you desire and the love you require is what guides your relationships. Love is not a noun, do not allow Merriam-Webster to have you searching for a “strong feeling”. There are many who have experienced a strong feeling and it turned out to be pain.  Love is not synonymous with pain. Love is found in actions.  Love is what causes you to care for someone other than yourself.  It makes you put others needs before yours.  Love will make you show compassion and empathy without being told that you should.

Now…we were created to form relationships with one another.  There is no such thing as an army of one. As I said, we were created, therefore designed to form bonds with each other.  It is natural for us to seek companionship. While seeking companionship, we must embrace our differences.  Our differences are what bind us.  We are all flawed but there is someone out there that will strengthen your weaknesses and in doing so they complement your imperfections.  Love is the catalyst that allows this to happen. Love is the acceptance of a less than perfect person and sharing your strengths with them to aid in their growth.  When you can encourage, support, and forgive without expecting reciprocal actions, you have begun to experience love.

What’s love got to do with it?  EVERYTHING!!! Love is what love does.  It is a free-fall experience.  It is vulnerability and selflessness.  In trying to define love, you should understand  that love is a sacrifice.  BUT, with this sacrifice, you add value to your life.  It is my sincere belief that we all desire to be loved and possibly desire even more that someone allows us to love them.  Reach beyond the limits you have placed on yourself and let love flow.

Chorus for today: “I’m a puzzle, yes indeed. Ever complex in every way and all the pieces aren’t even in the box. Yet you see the picture clear as day…You catch me when I fall, accept me, flaws and all and that’s why I love you”~Flaws and All

On the show Bones, Special Agent Booth is a Christian and no matter what happens in an episode, almost always, his faith is tested or God is mentioned…

Booth is a FBI agent and a scientist is his partner.  He sees things that could cause some people to question their faith and their belief that God has the final say.  His partner, the scientist, does not believe in God because she has a scientific explanation for everything that happens.  She often asks him does he still believe in God or if he made a decision because he wants to go to heaven. Booth has decided that no matter what he sees or what others say, he will serve God.  He has decided that he will stand on God’s promises even if he stands alone.  He owes everything to God and everything he does is because of God.  Booth does not concern himself with what science says or the evil things that people do.

We are taught for the most part that we must conform.  We have to fit into the ideal mold of “normalcy”, mirror those that surround us in our different areas of life.  The issue with normal is, there is no clear definition of the word.  Normal to you is not necessarily normal to me.  The truth is we were born to stand out.  My beliefs are rooted in what I learned as a child and what I have discovered as an adult.  They will not line up with any one else’s because no two lives are the same.  Our foundations may be the same but we will most certainly go about things differently because God has called us all on a different walk within our lives.  On our individual walks, we must become unapologetic about the fact that we were born to stand out.  God did not create us in the image of fear or inferiority.  We are the children of a King.  A King’s children do not minimize their existence because they will not be accepted or liked.  Just as Booth, we must stand alone at times.  Being different is a gift.  Embrace who God has called you to be and do not apologize for it.

While being interviewed, a popular correspondent was asked about her children and the appearance of a softer side since becoming a parent.  The interviewer asked what changed.  The correspondent answered, she thought that she would never have a family. Many years prior,  she experienced a tragedy and thought having a family was impossible for her.  Then she said, never give up on your dreams, no matter how long it takes to reach them.

Although you may have heard these words before, let it serve as confirmation that God is still writing your story.  Delay is not denial. Rest assured,  the plan for your life will come to pass.  Kept striving to reach your dreams.  Everyone’s story is different, do not compare your life to others because they will never look the same.  Also, from her tragedy, she was forever changed.  When God changes your life, nothing is the same.  People, places, and things will change.  In order to get to the place He’s taking you, you must also emerge a new creature.  You have to trust that no matter what it looks like, God is still in control!

Philippians 1:6…Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ: