Like many of you, I tuned in to watch the Bobby Brown Story, for many different reasons (I have not read

his book).  First and foremost, I wanted to see Bobby Brown’s life through the eyes of Bobby Brown.  I have read articles and seen stories told from the perspective of an onlooker BUT nothing beats a first hand account of a story.

Listen…by the end of day 2, I saw a piece of all of our lives in Uncle Bobby’s story.  I saw a life full of highs and lows.  I saw heartache, pain, and a man that has had to pick up the pieces and start over again and again. I saw someone that has loved and lost.  Someone that was full of life and wanted to enjoy every moment.

If you watched the series and picked through to determine which parts you choose to believe then you wasted your time.  We all go through trials and tribulations so that we can help others to see that there is victory on the other side.  Each part of the story built upon and expanded to another area of his life.  In the end, he is the sum total of every experience and a work in progress, still striving to get better.

I am grateful that Uncle Bobby brought HIStory to television and gave the world deeper insight into his life.  The story is told from HIS prospective and the wonderful thing about you telling your story is that no one gets to tell you what happened to you.

Be courageous enough to tell YOUR story.  The world is waiting.

I recently had an epiphany…many years ago, I was a side chick.  Now, I know the realization sounds a little shocking.  You may be asking questions like; how could you not know that you were a side chick?  Well, the answer is that I did not care enough at the time to think about it.

How does that happen???  Kinda like this…I was focused.  Focused on what I wanted. I was the boss of me.  He was a welcomed distraction but not enough of a distraction for me to realize all the moments he was an afterthought or a fill-in-the blank.  Now I am not giving him a pass and I do not promote cheating.  What I am saying is that I totally missed the process of changing from the object of his affection to the second place chick.

The story went something like this…we met under somewhat strange circumstances and we became almost inseparable.  In the beginning we talked all day, everyday, even while we were at work(shout out to Bluetooth technology) and then we talked until we went to sleep at night.  We also saw each other several times a week, at different time intervals.

At some point, I guess he grew tired of my unavailability/unwillingness to be who he needed and began to fill-in-the blank.  To be honest, I am certain that she was in the picture all along and I was quite possibly the fill-in-the blank BUT this is a tale about balance, not resolving the question of why he had the desire for two women.

So, back to my point…One night while we were together, he excused himself to answer a call.  He did not walk away or try to hide the fact that a female was calling.  When he hung up, I told him that was disrespectful or something to that effect.  He clearly responded that “if I was on my job, he would not be answering the phone.”

After this incident, I began to pull away from him and seek I wanted in my life(remember I am the boss of me).  I remember him questioning me about the distance and of course my answer was that I was busy.  Eventually, I told him that I started a new relationship and he confessed that he realized that he was in love with me.  The problem was that we had both run out of time.  There was nothing that he could say to repair our situationship, I did not trust him anymore. The good news is that we both went on to live our happily ever after eventually.

You see in life we put so many things before ourselves and our relationships all under the goal of looking out for ourselves( see how that does not add up).  Often times we think that we can push things to the side while we work our plan but we cannot control time nor add time when it is lost.  In order to achieve what we really want and need in life, we must find balance.  We have to be wives to OUR husbands, mothers to our children, girlfriends to OUR boyfriends, a friend to our friends and fulfill our positions at work,  all at the same time. All these roles require our attention and a certain level of devotion.  I believe that this is achieved when we prioritize our roles.  Ask yourself what is really important and adjust accordingly.

Loving you has been the best part of my life,

It’s not that you have been the best part but the love I feel for you is amazing.

Maybe I want you then again maybe I just want the me that loves you,

I don’t but I do.

It seems that it is never the right time for us,

You try to clone me and I try to clone you.

He’s nothing like you and she will never be me.

So maybe I want us then again maybe I just want the me that wants you,

I don’t but I do.

We do this dance over and over,

What should I say, what should I do.

Maybe I want to say I do then again maybe it is clear that I don’t,

I don’t but I do.

We will never make sense,

We were unexplainable.

So maybe I want too much then again maybe I don’t want it bad enough, 

I don’t but I do.

1 John 2:19~They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would no doubt have continued with us: but they went out, that they might be made manifest that they were not all of us.

As we travel through life, we meet so many different people along the way.  The beautiful thing about this process is that we have the opportunity to interact and learn from each other.  Where we interrupt this process is by assigning temporary people, permanent positions.

A temporary person is meant to teach you a particular lesson, show you a different perspective, or maybe just share some of their sunshine along the way.  Often times instead of accepting the temporary nature of these relationships, we prolong the completion of their purpose by turning them into a permanent fixture in our lives.

It is ok to let go! It is ok to let go!  It is ok to let go! Today, thank God for those who left.

Chorus for today: “Letting go, letting go ain’t easy. Oh, it’s just exceedingly hurtful. ‘Cause somebody you used to know, is flinging your world around. And they watch, as you’re falling down, down, down, falling down, baby.”~MC

Life’s riches are not measured by material possessions…

I’m wealthy because my riches are stored up in relationships.  Those who deposit love, knowledge, wisdom, and time have ensured that I will never go broke.  As you go through life, you learn to spend more time appreciating the positive people in your life and ignoring the negative ones.  Those who deposit negativity have a purpose in your life but you should never reserve them a place.  The power of prayer can turn a negative into a positive so, keep praying and keep moving.

My chorus for today: “Count on me through thick and thin, a friendship that will never end. When you are weak, I will be strong.  Helping you to carry on.  Call on me, I will be there.  Don’t be afraid, please believe me when I say count on….”~Waiting to Exhale

My circle rocks!!!

As you grow up, you go through stages of relationships.  The things that matter at the age of 2 don’t matter when you are 20 and have changed again by age 25.  However, there are some relationships that evolve as you do with age.  Some people are  just destined to be by your side forever.

The challenge is to know when to nurture a relationship and when to release one.  Sunday May 6, 2012 is the first day of my new season.  I am nurturing my lifetime relationships.  As I move into this season, my lifers are providing everything I need.  I’m grateful for solid relationships that have withstood all elements of time.  I’m also thankful for every fair-weather relationship.  The negative made me appreciate the positive more.

My chorus for today is: “Took me a while but I’m finally here.  So, I just wanna testify, make this crystal clear.  See I’ve been picked out, to be picked on, talked about out of my friend’s mouth.  I’ve been beat down, til He turned my life around…”~The Fighting Temptations